‘Darling, It is about time to love yourself…’
It is a hard and cruel world we live in. Hard, cruel and awfully unapologetic. The greatest burden we put over ourselves is the need for approval, for a little respect and love from others… And we get tramped in the process… And shattered to pieces.
Of course, it is wonderful to be loved for who we are, respected with sincerity, adored, but this game has actually long gone overboard. We play it hard, and with unflagging need… A kind of dependence on others for the happiness in our life. Addicted on people for love and acceptance.
Negligence, scarring words, disrespect, contempt — we willingly accept it all for that little bit of love. And in this trail, we let ourselves get lost, in other people’s opinions.
Is it really healthy to be in such relationships?
The kind of love, that can affect us, hit directly on our self-esteem, is it worth it? The kind of love, that can weaken our mind and slacken our goals, do we need it?
The need for approval from others has shrivelled us, has shrunken us. The want of this need is great on our daily life, pushing us towards a kind of surrender. We do surrender, without realizing it. For love, we assure. But how far must we sacrifice for love? How far can we go to keep love alive?
It is still something unanswered.
Oh, we tell ourselves, if I don’t sacrifice, then is it true love?
But is it true love, if it ask us to sacrifice all? To sacrifice ourselves?
There are women who live in a kind of dejected acceptance in abusive relationships, because they are in love. And to them, they are sacrificing for true love.
There are people who let themselves be handled the way they don’t deserve — not even a single bit — for the sake of love. And yes, they are living the grandest of love.
Oh, bother!
Is this the kind of love we want ourselves to have? A love that can hurt and humiliate, that can abuse and debase? What’s the use of that love, when we can very well walk away and have a liberating life away from it?
Don’t we all deserve a grand life? A grander love?
What’s the use of settling when we can have more? What’s the use of giving into the meanest, lowest kind of adoration, when there’s a greater probability for great love out there?
WAKE UP!
It’s okay not to satisfy everyone you come across. But it is not okay to dissatisfy yourself in the process of satisfying others
And that’s the greatest stupidity of all. We want… We want to satisfy, to gratify others and neglect ourselves, our needs and desires in that course we take.
It’s time to put ourselves, our needs first. It doesn’t necessarily mean we’re being selfish. It just means we have waken up from a slumber. We have eschewed away from the addiction.
It’s only a short life we live and we can’t waste it on other people’s opinions and judgements. If you want to do something, do it, for yourself… If you want to make something out of your life, which no one approves of, tell them to mind their own business and make it.
FOR IT IS YOUR LIFE.
And don’t let others guide you in the direction you hate, because you’re in love. Don’t let others smash your heart, because they say they love. Ask them to go and do damn well what they please and you do what you please.
Because, in the end all that matters is how you’ve loved yourself the way you deserved. How you’ve lived your life, the way you wanted…
There’s a kind of love… A love, that’s like wings, which bring you to the stars and the sky.
That is what you need.
This valentine’s day, make it sure you’re exactly where you want to be, and not excusing the place you’re in. This valentine’s day, realize it is okay to be single than in a denunciatory, offensive, humiliating, abusing love/relationship.
Love yourself, and put all of them a step behind you.
This Valentine’s day, take an oath to love yourself a little more than you love others, for you deserve it… YOU DESERVE IT…
I’ll end it with an old thing I wrote once:
Love and affection – can they be tagged with a price?
You say you’ll love, if I love you back, more than you love me.
You say you’ll love, if I give my all, give up everything that I am.
You say you’ll love, if I close my eyes against all your wrongs.
You say you’ll love, if I support you, and let you control me.
You say you’ll love, if I cut my wings down, and never fly.
Love and affection – can they be labelled and sold?
The price of your love costs a fortune, and I don’t know how
To fight and win this long-played game of buying and selling.
You shall be the seller, but I shall never buy it again. No.
Your love has become my greatest fear. It has become
The butcher of my beautiful, beautiful dreams.
Today, I shall cut all the shackles binding my heart
And fly away. Free from this hopeless meander
And enjoy the liberation from the smothering cage.
I don’t want a love that costs me myself. Not anymore.
But then, love and affection – can they be tagged and sold?
If they are tagged, can they really be love and affection?
~~~
Stardust Diaries 