‘Laundry and The Prejudices’
Laundry, is it only a woman’s job?
Well. It depends. I have seen women who are possessive of the clothes — clothes everyone wears, and wouldn’t want anyone else to destroy it more by washing. I have also seen women who wouldn’t mind a helping hand or two from her husband. More or less, it is about understanding and willingness of men to help their wife or mother.
To be honest, the survey result didn’t shock me much. I am used to how Indian community works from day first… As soon as a woman marries, she is required to do all the works. Sometimes, even before that. And this is often started and stated firmly by woman themselves. Can you say no to that? When a woman doesn’t know how to cook or wash or do things, there are women who asks… ‘How can a woman not know that? What is this!!!’ And they will have an expression as if they have just smelled a garbage truck passing by. Weeelll…. Yes, mam, I am a woman. And this is my choice.
Yes, I have been at the receiving end of these questions, because I don’t know how to cook, or do anything even after my marriage. I am the princess in my house and I enjoy it. It is our town custom to live in mom’s house even after marriage, so I don’t have that many pressure to familiarize myself with vessels and dirty clothes and chicken legs. It was only when I moved to Bangalore, I learnt how to cook and manage the house. And my hubby has helped me along the way, to learn these things.
I don’t mind doing works, not anymore. I don’t go outside to work. I am home 24/7, writing and reading, and in my free time, it is not much of a burden to the chores. It is easier for me, but I still complain. So… Pushing this upon working woman, that is a form of injustice, of course. While women toil away in kitchen and laundry room, listening music or watching cricket are the things that brings men headache… And then the woman have to bring coffee or tea to alleviate the said headache, which was spurred on by India’s failure in the cricket match. How awesome!
But I have to say the season is slowly changing. But there are men, who have the heart to share the burden, who enjoys the sharing of job. I have seen changes. Enjoyed the changes and cherished it. The changes, that is slowly altering the scenarios, destroying the prejudices thrust upon women. Prejudices that burden women. Men are slowly accustoming themselves to these changes as well… A bit slow, but the changes are happening visibly.
I have the privilege to meet such men in my life. Not to sound boastful, or to sound like a braggart, but this topic goes invalid in my household. It doesn’t happen that way in my life. And I am happy it doesn’t. I am not a woman who can take easily to many prejudices. I am not the one who can easily be bullied into doing things. If any, I am the bully in my household. 😉
The men in my life are way more comprehending and helpful. More accommodating. Taking efforts to share half of the burden. Not many can have that opportunity. That privilege. I am happy I have that. I am happy that I can witness the changes.
My dad is the first one I can quote as an example against the question, ‘Is laundry only a woman’s job?’ My dad says ‘No. Of course not.’ And he doesn’t even hesitate for a moment to answer it. According to him, it is relatively easy to share the burden. To relieve my mom of her duty. A happy comradeship existing between couples can destroy ego fights and many small quarrels, which leads to bigger problems, and ultimately to destruction of a marriage. Even though, we have a washing machine, he washes his clothes by hand and often helps in drying the clothes in our garden and picking them up.
And then there is my hubby. He helps me in loading the washing machine. We have an old-fashioned washing machine, without automatic controls. My hubby changes water, and also help me in drying the clothes. He does ironing. He is the one who does dishes after dinner. He often moans about doing it, but does it nonetheless. Like I said, I am a bully. 🙂
To conclude it, it is stupid to thrust a particular job on women. They goes to work, these days. Earn money. Helps in running the family. Balances the household expenses. So why not men couldn’t help their women to live a somewhat easy life? Why couldn’t they ease the weight off their wives’ shoulders? It is not a matter of argument. It is matter of respect and love. Care and concern. Not as severe as afflicting equality, I think, but equally as important as reflecting sincerity and leading a happy and balanced life.